Anger Secrets

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Is anger always a bad thing? Or are there times when feeling angry actually makes sense? In this episode of The Anger Secrets Podcast, anger expert Alastair Duhs explains why anger itself isn’t the problem. The real damage happens when anger is either suppressed or expressed in ways that hurt relationships. You’ll learn what healthy anger really looks like, how it differs from destructive anger and how to express anger in a way that protects trust, communication and emotional safety. What you’ll learn in this episode normal and necessary Key principles of healthy anger: expressed Practical tips covered: “I” statements Want help applying this? If you’d like support learning how to express anger in healthier ways: free trainingfree 30-minute Anger Assessment CallThe Complete Anger Management System Visit angersecrets.com to get started. Anger doesn’t need to be eliminated. It needs to be understood and used wisely. And remember: You can’t control other people, but you can control yourself.

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Why is it that one small comment can turn into a full-blown argument in some relationships, while in others, it barely causes a ripple? In this episode of The Anger Secrets Podcast, anger expert Alastair Duhs explains why relationships don’t usually break down because of the big arguments. They unravel through hundreds of small moments that slowly erode trust, safety and goodwill. You’ll learn a powerful concept that explains why the same words can feel harmless one day and deeply triggering the next, and how small, practical shifts can dramatically change the emotional climate of your relationship. What you’ll learn in this episode: positivenegative sentiment override Three practical shifts discussed: Let your partner influence youIncrease expressions of appreciationTurn towards each other Want help applying this? If you’re noticing your relationship feels tense, reactive or fragile, support is available: free trainingfree 30-minute Anger Assessment CallThe Complete Anger Management System Visit angersecrets.com to get started. Relationships aren’t usually damaged in one big moment. They change direction through small choices made every day. And remember: You can’t control other people, but you can control yourself.

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. What do you do when the person you love no longer wants to be with you, and anger, fear or past behaviour has broken trust? In this episode of The Anger Secrets Podcast, anger expert Alastair Duhs speaks directly to those facing one of the hardest moments in a relationship: separation caused by anger issues. With honesty and realism, he explains why rebuilding trust takes time, and outlines a clear, step-by-step path forward for those who are genuinely committed to change. This isn’t about quick fixes or saying the right words. It’s about doing the work that actually matters. What you’ll learn in this episode is possible The five steps covered in the episode: Need support with this? If you want help managing your anger or guidance on rebuilding your relationship: free trainingfree 30-minute Anger Assessment CallThe Complete Anger Management System All options are available at angersecrets.com. Rebuilding a relationship after separation isn’t easy — but with commitment, patience and the right support, it can be done. And remember: You can’t control other people, but you can control yourself.

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you ever gone to bed replaying an argument over and over in your mind, wishing you’d said things differently, wishing you’d stayed calmer or wishing the damage hadn’t been done? If so, you’re not alone. And more importantly, it doesn’t mean you’re a bad partner or a bad person. It means something inside you is trying to tell you something, and learning how to listen to that signal can change everything. In this episode of The Anger Secrets Podcast, host Alastair Duhs shares four practical, grounded strategies to help you handle anger in your relationship before it causes regret, distance or lasting damage. Rather than suppressing anger or blaming yourself, you’ll learn how to understand what’s really driving it, and how to respond in a calmer, more constructive way. Anger isn’t the real problem. Losing control of it is. And that’s something you can learn to change. What you’ll learn in this episode anger triggersstress and angersignal Why this matters Unmanaged anger doesn’t just disappear on its own. Over time, it erodes trust, creates emotional distance and can turn even small disagreements into painful conflicts. The good news? When you understand what triggers your anger, learn how to communicate openly, manage stress and remember that you and your partner are on the same team, arguments lose their intensity and connection becomes possible again. These aren’t complicated techniques. They’re practical skills you can start using immediately. Key ideas from the episode Weekly Relationship Check-In Ready to take the next step? If you want help applying these ideas to your own relationship, you have a few options: -Watch the free training on how to break the anger cycle -Book a free 30-minute Anger Assessment Call to talk through your situation -Learn more about The Complete Anger Management System You’ll find all of these at angersecrets.com.

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. You're in the middle of an argument and you know where it's headed. But what if you could change the outcome before things spiral out of control? In this essential episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs reveals how to recognise the signs of escalating conflict and use simple, proven repair techniques to stop fights before they start and strengthen your relationship instead. Key Takeaways: -Every argument offers a choice: escalate the fight or repair the connection. -The first step to de-escalating conflict is recognising your own signs of rising anger. -Reminding yourself that the relationship matters more than “being right” helps calm tension. -Repair attempts, like a kind tone, humor, a break or physical affection can powerfully shift the dynamic. -Noticing and accepting your partner’s repair attempts builds trust and prevents emotional damage. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. It’s often not the big things that make you angry. It’s the small stuff that hijacks your day. In this thoughtful episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs explores why seemingly minor annoyances can trigger such big reactions, and how learning to let go of them can radically improve your relationships, your mood and your life. Key Takeaways: -Small events like a comment or forgotten chore often trigger anger because of deeper emotional patterns. -Reacting in the heat of the moment usually leads to regret. Pausing first gives you power. -Asking, “Will this matter in a week or a year?” helps you gain perspective and avoid overreacting. -Practicing gratitude can rewire your brain to focus on what really matters, not petty irritations. -Recognising life’s fragility can shift your focus from frustration to compassion and connection. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Most relationships don’t fall apart in one explosive moment. They unravel quietly through patterns we barely notice. In this eye-opening episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs reveals the four hidden killers that silently destroy relationships from the inside out. If your connection with your partner feels colder, more distant or just off, this episode might explain why, and what you can do about it. Key Takeaways: -Criticism, defensiveness, contempt and stonewalling are four of the most destructive behaviors in relationships. -These patterns often feel normal, but over time they erode trust, love and emotional safety. -Each “killer” has an antidote, like appreciation, responsibility or effective communication that can rebuild connection. -Anger often fuels these behaviors, making anger management a crucial step toward healthier relationships. -By learning to recognise and replace these patterns, you can stop the slow drift apart and bring warmth and closeness back into your relationship. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Ever feel like you and your partner are speaking different languages, even when you're in the same room? In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs reveals why active listening is the missing link in most relationships, and how mastering it can bring you closer than ever before. If you’re tired of arguments that go nowhere, this episode offers a better way forward. Key Takeaways: -Active listening means being fully present, not planning your reply while your partner is still talking. -It’s not about winning the conversation; it’s about making your partner feel truly heard and understood. -Four core skills: Minimal encouragers, open-ended questions, reflecting and positive feedback can transform the way you communicate. -Simple changes in how you listen can open up emotional connection and reduce defensiveness. -Practicing these skills builds trust, de-escalates conflict and strengthens your relationship at its core. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. After an anger outburst, the silence can feel unbearable. In this heartfelt episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs reveals the one essential ingredient most people overlook when trying to change: a powerful personal “why.” Through real stories from men and women just like you, this episode will help you uncover the deeper reason you want to control your anger, and help you finally break free from the cycle for good. Key Takeaways: -Change only lasts when it’s driven by a deeper purpose, not just guilt or willpower. -Real-life stories show that many people want to control their anger for their families, their children, or their sense of self-respect. -Identifying your personal “why” gives you strength in tough moments and keeps you committed to growth. -Anger can destroy relationships. But with a clear reason to change, you can rebuild connection and trust. -Your “why” must be stronger than your anger to truly transform your life. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you ever found yourself in an argument before you even realise what triggered it? In this powerful episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs explores how defensiveness quietly damages relationships, and how you can stop it. Learn why your instinct to defend yourself often masks deeper fears, and how choosing connection over combat can transform your relationship. Key Takeaways: -Defensiveness often stems from the fear that we're to blame, even when we don’t want to admit it. -The key to change is awareness: notice your emotional triggers before reacting. -Taking even partial responsibility can immediately diffuse tension and build trust. -Empathy transforms conflict: put yourself in your partner’s shoes to respond with care, not combat. -Honest, calm communication breaks the cycle of blame and opens the door to healing. -Change won’t happen overnight, but with intention and practice, defensiveness can be replaced by understanding. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you ever said, “You made me so mad”? In this episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs unpacks the hidden cost of blaming others for your anger—and the freedom that comes when you take full responsibility for your actions. If you’re ready to step out of blame, stop the cycle of conflict and take back control of your emotions, this episode offers the insights and tools you need to begin. Key Takeaways: -Blaming others for your anger gives away your power and keeps you stuck in reactive, unhealthy patterns. -Taking responsibility for your actions means owning your choices, not justifying or excusing hurtful behavior. -Four common reasons people avoid responsibility include fear of consequences, family conditioning, entitlement and shame. -Real change begins with acknowledging your actions, accepting the consequences, and committing to a plan for change. -Anger management programs provide essential skills for managing emotions in real time—something therapy often doesn’t cover. -Taking ownership of your anger is a courageous step that leads to more respectful, loving, and empowered relationships. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. When therapy didn’t work, Katie feared she’d never get control of her anger. Her relationship was falling apart, her parenting was suffering and she was terrified of repeating the cycle of anger she grew up with. In this inspiring episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs interviews Katie about her powerful journey—how she broke free from past patterns, what finally helped and how her family life has transformed as a result. Key Takeaways: -Therapy often focuses on the past, but anger needs to be managed in the present with clear, practical tools. -Katie’s turning point came through the Complete Anger Management System, where she learned how to recognise her early warning signs of anger and take real-time action. -Using the Tension Scale, Positive Self-Talk and the Anger Diary, Katie was able to reflect, grow and change how she responds to stress. -Change is not always linear, but with commitment and support, progress is absolutely possible—even in a few short weeks. -Healing generational anger is possible and Katie’s story shows that with the right tools, you can create a better future for yourself and your children. -Supportive, relationship-focused anger management can lead to real breakthroughs for both individuals and couples. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you ever felt the urge to prove you're right—especially in the heat of an argument? In this powerful episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs shares a personal story and a lesson from a truck-driving client that will change the way you think about conflict. Discover why letting go of the need to be right isn’t weakness—it’s one of the most powerful things you can do to protect your relationships and your peace of mind. Key Takeaways: -The need to “be right” often fuels conflict, putting your relationships and emotional health at risk. -Trying to prove someone else wrong rarely creates connection—it usually leads to resentment and defensiveness. -Seeking to understand instead of arguing your point helps de-escalate tension and fosters mutual respect. -Letting go of being right doesn’t mean giving in—it means valuing the relationship over the need to win. -Even small changes in behavior, like giving others space, can have a big impact on your calmness and safety, both emotionally and physically. -When you release the urge to control others, you gain true control over yourself. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Arguments that start small often end in deep emotional disconnect. In this heartfelt episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs explores how seemingly minor issues can spiral into major conflicts—and how you can change that. He shares three simple but powerful tips that will help you manage conflict better, communicate more effectively and reconnect with your partner in a meaningful way. Key Takeaways: -Conflict doesn’t have to damage your relationship—when handled well, it can actually bring you closer together. -Trying to “win” arguments only leads to both partners losing; the goal is mutual understanding, not victory. -Active listening and asking thoughtful, open-ended questions can break patterns of miscommunication and foster deeper connection. -Small, intentional acts of appreciation and quality time go a long way in keeping a relationship strong and loving. -Making your relationship a priority—despite life’s busyness—helps build emotional intimacy and trust. -Even couples on the brink of separation can rebuild connection with the right tools and willingness to grow together. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you ever felt like your anger comes out of nowhere—one moment you're fine, and the next you're exploding? In this insightful episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs breaks down the real reasons why you might think you get angry so quickly. By understanding what's truly happening beneath the surface, you can learn to spot the early warning signs of anger, break unhelpful habits and regain control before things spiral. Key Takeaways: -Anger rarely comes out of nowhere—there are always warning signs, and learning to spot them is the first step to staying in control. -The Tension Scale is a simple but powerful tool to help you track your stress before it boils over into anger. -Anger can become a learned habit, especially if you grew up around frequent outbursts—but habits can be unlearned with awareness and effort. -Your brain works incredibly fast, processing emotions and past experiences in the background, which can make anger feel sudden even when it’s not. -Reframing your thoughts in moments of conflict can help you choose understanding over outburst, even in high-stress situations. -With practice, patience and the right tools, you can replace reactive anger with calm, respectful responses that strengthen your relationships. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you ever said something in anger that you instantly regretted? In this episode of the Anger Secrets Podcast, anger expert Alastair Duhs shares six powerful, practical tips to help you stay calm and in control—even in the heat of the moment. Whether you're struggling with sudden outbursts or lingering tension, these strategies can help you shift from reactive to reflective, strengthening your relationships and your emotional well-being. Key Takeaways: -Anger is a habit, not your identity—and habits can be changed with the right tools and awareness. -Your thoughts—not the events themselves—are what trigger your anger, which means you have the power to shift your emotional response. -The Tension Scale helps you recognise how close you are to an angry outburst so you can act before things escalate. -Expressing anger aggressively or abusively never helps—it often worsens the situation and damages trust in your relationships. -Simple relaxation techniques, like deep breathing and reframing your thoughts, can calm your body and mind in moments of stress. -Taking a Time-Out—done respectfully and with clear agreements—can prevent conflict from spiralling out of control and protect your connection with others. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Breaking The Anger Cycle angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. What if one moment of clarity could save your relationship? In this heartfelt episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs sits down with Paul, a single father whose anger was slowly pushing away the people he loved most. When his partner said life felt like “walking on eggshells,” Paul knew something had to change — and in just a few weeks, everything began to shift. This is a story of courage, self-awareness and the power of choosing a different path. Key Takeaways: -Constant stress and anger can make home life feel unsafe — even when there’s no physical violence -Awareness is the first step to change; noticing the signs in your body helps you stop before you snap -Small changes like pausing and using calm language (“That hurt”) can radically improve communication and connection -Many people grew up in angry households and inherited poor emotional tools — but you can learn better ones -Real progress doesn’t happen overnight. It’s gradual, honest, and deeply worth it. -When someone says, “I have my best friend back,” that’s the real power of anger management Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Control Your Anger in 7 Days angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Are you telling yourself you'll deal with your anger someday? In this compassionate yet eye-opening episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs breaks down the five most common reasons people avoid anger management — and why those reasons might be keeping you stuck. If you're ready to stop making excuses and start changing your life, this episode is your wake-up call. Key Takeaways: -Believing “anger management won’t work” often stems from past disappointments — but the right tools can lead to real, lasting change. -You don’t need years of therapy — just a few minutes a day with the right strategies can start to shift your reactions in as little as 21 days. -Anger management is personal — and modern programs, like Alastair’s, combine universal principles with one-on-one support and coaching. -The true cost of not dealing with your anger isn’t financial — it’s measured in broken trust, damaged relationships and missed opportunities. -Even if you’re not tech-savvy, online anger programs are designed to be simple and accessible, with support every step of the way. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Control Your Anger in 7 Days angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. Have you ever poured a drink to unwind, only to find yourself angrier than before? In this eye-opening episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs explores the often misunderstood connection between alcohol and anger. Whether you're a casual drinker or someone who struggles with outbursts after a night out, this episode offers clarity, compassion, and a practical path forward. Key Takeaways: -Alcohol lowers your inhibitions and impairs judgment, making you more likely to lash out in anger -If you already have unresolved anger, alcohol can act like gasoline on a fire — intensifying aggression and conflict -Drinking doesn’t cause abusive behavior, but it does magnify emotions that are already beneath the surface. Recognising your personal limits and planning ahead can help prevent alcohol-fueled arguments -If drinking regularly leads to regret or outbursts, it may be time to reconsider its role in your life. -True change comes from looking inward — at the beliefs, habits and triggers that drive your anger — not just cutting back on alcohol. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Control Your Anger in 7 Days angersecrets.com/course — Enroll in The Complete Anger Management System

For more information on how to control your anger, visit angersecrets.com. What if 30 years of anger could be transformed in just five weeks? In this powerful episode, anger expert Alastair Duhs shares the remarkable story of Raymond, a man whose volatile temper nearly ended his marriage — until one turning point helped him change everything. If you've ever felt like your anger is out of control, Raymond's journey will give you hope, practical tools, and a reminder that it’s never too late to change. Key Takeaways: -Even deeply rooted anger can be overcome — Raymond went from yelling five or six times a day to raising his voice just once in five weeks -Understanding that you can control your anger, rather than it controlling you, is a game-changer -Simple strategies like taking a Time-Out and not reacting immediately can prevent arguments and rebuild connection -Anger often has deep roots in past experiences, but healing and change are still possible at any stage of life -Online anger management programs offer the flexibility and repetition needed to reinforce lasting change -When you manage your anger, the effects ripple through your entire life — from your marriage to your workplace to your sense of peace. Links referenced in this episode: angersecrets.com — Learn more about anger management angersecrets.com/training — Watch the free training: Control Your Anger in 7 Days angersecrets.com/course — Enrol in The Complete Anger Management System